Learning from My Mother

May 12, 2017May 12, 2017 ~ myrlovely1287 ~ Leave a comment

My mother teaches me something every day, but here are some gems in honor of her this mother’s day weekend:

There are several ways to interpret every situation, every pitfall, and every struggle. Choose the interpretation/reaction that not only adds value but keeps your joy. Nothing should be able to take your joy away. –I’m still working on this one. I get riled up sometimes and because I care, I get riled up for my mom and yet she doesn’t seem as phased or impacted as I am.

Move on quickly, make up quickly. Have your feelings, indulge for a second and then move on and most importantly let go. Your negative feelings only succeed in holding you back and keeping you down. Figure out the next step and find that silver lining. There is always one. I still remember wrong doings I’ve done to my mother. Times I have flown off the handle and said things I didn’t mean. She never brings them up, never throws them in my face. She does not live with that baggage and weight of carrying around memories and holding on to moments of distress to rehash and relive them in some distant future. I’m trying to get this one too… I fail regularly.

Love fully, completely, and consistently. It’s easy when you look at someone and they are doing everything you wish they would do. It’s real when you can still love fully, completely and consistently when you look at someone and they are everything you wish they weren’t. That is the beauty about love. It doesn’t waiver. I am bossy. I can be aggressive and rude and sarcastic all at the same time. Sometimes I have to consciously bite my tongue and sometimes I fail. My mother hugs me anyway, loves me anyway, will pick up my pieces, will bend over backwards, will go to the end of the earth to make me happy despite my shortcomings and yet she STILL tells me the truth. She leads by an amazing example.

Be yourself. If you love dressing up and taking pictures with flowers, do it. If you don’t feel whole unless your hair is permed, then perm away. If your purse must match your shoes no matter what the occasion, do it. If you like to wear fuzzy socks in the summer and sleep in onesies, do it. Don’t let anyone tell you who to be or what is weird. Be weird, be different, be annoying, be you. No one else will. You were not put on this earth to fit in. We were put here to stand out and share our light.

Happy Mother’s Day Mom! Thank you for everything!

Losing

February 28, 2017February 28, 2017 ~ myrlovely1287 ~ Leave a comment

Guard it with your life, pleads the mother of four. But four have already decided to expose themselves to the other, leaving none. One explains that she is in love and he is hers from now until the end. So really there is no point in waiting for the purest day at the hour of their consummation. He is here now and will be there then. Mother responds, “My child, it’s hard to close the doors when the goods are in such high demand but power lies behind your fortress. Power lies beneath your skin. I cannot tell all the mistakes I’ve made or force you to learn from them. But from them I can inform you, protect you”. Eyes are rolled and steps are taken to escape the discerning eyes of the elder. As she walks away we are reminded that only time will tell who remains in the end and at that point we hope there are no regrets.

Being a Mom

February 23, 2017February 28, 2017 ~ myrlovely1287 ~ Leave a comment

What I’ve learned from being a mother:

walking-down-a-path You can show your kid one path but you can’t force them to take it. Walk with them anyway.

You can give and give and give but they still may not be happy. Keep giving anyway.

You may not always feel the “love” but they were not made to love you. You were made to love them. So keep loving them. The rest will come.

They cannot be returned. You cannot get a refund. You cannot get another one. As much as you might like, you cannot throw them out the window. They are yours forever.

You get 97% trouble and 3% smiles. It’s ALL perfect but live for the smiles.

If they act like they hate you and only want to make things hard for you. You cannot get even. Love them through it.

Everything is a choice. You can choose to dwell on the sleepless nights, the throw up and the fact that they won’t do things as you like or you can choose to focus on the good times, the laughs, their beauty, and your love for them. One choice doesn’t enrich your life at ALL (in fact it will make you miserable) and the other allows you to live more freely. Choose wisely.

Sometimes you have to make two meals (this is not just about food). They may not always want to eat WHEN or WHAT you want to eat. Feed them anyway, it’s your job.

At the end of the day your job is to encourage and support them.Criticizing and discouraging does not help. Find a way to say what you mean from a place of love.

When you smile you get a smile back. When you are constantly frowning what do you expect?

And last but certainly not least, being a parent is amazing. 30 years from now you will never forget the day they were born and the overwhelming joy that came with them. It’s not always perfect but then that’s the beauty of it… Remember that and Enjoy it!